Top 5 Places Women Shouldn’t Breastfeed

Breastfeeding in public is arguably one of the most controversial topics in the US today. Growing up I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life but one thing always seemed like a given – I would get married and have kids; I wanted to be a wife and a mom. Fast forward to 2024 and I am married with a beautiful daughter.

Formula was never a “bad” thing in my home growing up but my mother breastfed and most women I know breastfed so the logical assumption for me to make in my life was that I would breastfeed. However, whether it’s because it wasn’t the norm to discuss before or simply that I wasn’t aware of these conversations happening around me since they didn’t apply at the time, I never quite realized the mental and physical toll behind breastfeeding.

For starters, that assumption I made that I would breastfeed didn’t mean I also assumed the struggles that would come with it. From being a barely-enougher or having to use a nipple shield (something I had never heard of let alone planned to use) or being the sole provider of food, my journey is unique but also shockingly similar to many moms today.

You’re never taught HOW to breastfeed and another big assumption I made, unknowingly, was that it was relatively straightforward. But put together the fact that there are about 100 different moving factors and the fact that every baby is different and you have quite the learning curve on your hands.

One surprising thing I learned on this journey (as early on in it as I am) is the acceptance that has come with it. People are very understanding when I need to step out to get situated and feed her and they are empathetic when I answer their “How are you doing????” with a soft smile and an, “Oh, ya know…” implying I am less than ok but don’t want to unload my struggles on to them.

Honestly, all the revelations I’ve had since entering this season of my life (good or bad) have given me a bigger appreciation for myself, my body, and every woman before me who had children. That being said, at this time these are the places I have found that you definitely should NOT breastfeed:

 

1. In a restaurant

This one should be obvious! Adults are trying to enjoy a nice meal. Why should your baby (who totally and completely depends on you for nourishment and doesn’t know how to manipulate, only what their tiny bodies biologically NEED) get to eat as well??

 

2. At the park

This family-friendly place where kids are supposed to be allowed to just be kids and enjoy being outside is not the place for you to bring the smallest member of your family. Where they are just trying to be a baby and grow. And enjoy the time outside. Sorry, this is only for every OTHER member of your family.

 

 

3. In a church

As a Catholic, my prayer life definitely looks different after having a baby. However, you definitely shouldn’t be nursing your baby in the church building! If you’re like me, your time with the Lord has already dropped drastically since you’re fighting for your life against this tiny person but that definitely doesn’t mean you should be able to listen to a homily or participate in this sacrament. That’s just greedy.

 

4. At your family/friend’s house

Isn’t it enough that you are bringing an additional person into their space? Now you want to CARE FOR that little person as well? Seems pretty selfish.

 

At home

There are likely other members of your family who are trying to go about their day. Whether you are nursing on the couch or at the table or in bed, these other people can probably still see you and it’s a chance of scenery in their day.

 

Now that we have gone over those 5 places I feel the need to make it crystal clear in case it wasn’t before: I AM 100% joking!! I feel it’s sad that I have to clarify that in the world today but I also feel it is sad that there are still people who think that there’s any place that would not be acceptable to feed your child.

With that being said, I would like to clarify something else. I do feel it is necessary to maintain some level of modesty with this. While I don’t believe you should miss out on living your life for the comfort of others or simply because you chose to grace the world with a small human, for your dignity as a woman and mother of this person, you owe it to yourself to keep private things private. Simultaneously, I can see how having baby on the boob during a church service with NO cover would be inappropriate. Or at a playground where there are other children. Or somewhere there are creeps. That’s why I think always having a nursing cover in your diaper bag is a MUST (click here for my complete list of what to have in your diaper bag!)

However, in those situations, I feel that using a cover is more about respect for yourself vs the comfort of those around you. And, yes, sometimes you will miss things or when you go do something it will look a lot different than it has previously, but that’s a JOY of motherhood, not a burden on your life (though it may feel like it at the time).

Personally, I find myself cutting out a lot of things that were a lot more hollow than I had realized and weren’t adding much to my life, especially after experiencing the joy of being a mom. I sympathize with those who are struggling because they don’t feel this way and that is part of the reason I am so passionate about keeping your baby flexible to your lifestyle!

At the end of the day, the most important thing is that your baby is happy, healthy, and loved. It shouldn’t matter what society thinks about your method of doing this as long as it works. It is not frowned upon to have women walking around in revealing clothing and you would never ask a mother to not give her baby a bottle in certain places. Babies have needs that only you as the parent can meet and they are depending on you. They are not manipulating you or attention-seeking. Trust your instinct and keep crushing this mom thing!